believing God is as good as He says He is

Psalm 34:8 says, "Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the [person] who takes refuge in Him." This verse shows up about a third of the way into the psalm. It follows after verses that talk about extoling and praising the LORD, boasting and glorifying Him, and about calling out to Him, and being saved from all of one's troubles. It is followed by poetic promises: if we fear Him, we will lack nothing; that those who seek after the LORD will lack no good thing; and that the eyes of the LORD are on the righteous, and that His ears are attentive to their cry.

But do you really believe God is as good as He says He is? I believe this, and I struggle to believe this. In all honesty, I have always struggled to believe it deep down. I believe it with my head, but struggle to always believe it in my heart. But this is more complicated. You see, its about fear - fear of the LORD. Not because I fear Him not loving me. No. I fear God because I know that while He loves me, my life is only worth His glory. That is, if it be to His glory, He will allow me to die.

I say this not to disdain the LORD. But instead, I think this is the key to trusting in the goodness of the LORD. You see, only a good God can both love me and allow my life to be to His glory. God's glory is wrapped up in His goodness. His goodness is something of a by-product, if you will, of His love for His creation, for us, for me. His goodness permeates everything that defines our relationship. And it is ultimately demonstrated in Jesus' death on the cross, and underscored by His resurrection. In being baptized in the name of the Triune God, we are invited to partcipate and share in goodness of the LORD.

While the psalmist could never have imagined it, for Christians, everytime we receive the Eucharist, we are tasting and seeing that the LORD is good. Through the sacraments, we are brought into God's goodness, and that goodness is reinforced in our hearts and minds through the word-act and deed-act that are demonstrated for us in the proclamation of the Word of God in both the preaching from the Scriptures and the celebration of the Lord's Supper.

Yes, I still struggle with believing God is as good as He says He is. But it's not because of anything He's done, so much as my need to remember the words and deeds of the LORD; to remember that even if my suffering or death is what will bring Him glory, I will taste and see that the LORD is good when I join Him in glory. When we live within and as part of the body of Christ, the community of faith that is the local Church, we may experience this goodness through the kindnesses and love of other believers. We stand together, we live life together, in part, to remind one another and encourage one another that God is as good as He says He is.

In the end, we can only believe that God is good if we step out in faith; only in "tasting" and "seeing" for ourselves. We must believe, because having faith demands that we do so. The reward is that we find out, even in the midst of troubling and distressing experiences and events, that God is good, and His love endures forever. Amen and amen.

What do you think? Let me know.

The Waiting is the Hardest Part

It's a cold day in February, and I'm in the final stages of sending the hard copies of papers and paperwork off to Durham U. in the UK to complete my application for Ph.D. studies in Systematic Theology there. I'm waiting for a couple of references, as well as printing out two papers to send along as well.

The challenge is the 'wait'. I am not a good wait-er. Patience is a fruit of the Spirit (appropriately enough, the King James Version calls it 'long-suffering'). Sometimes I wonder how I can be saved and still be so impatient. But I comfort myself remembering that my salvation is by God's grace so that I may not boast.

But that doesn't change the fact that I am waiting. I applied to Trinity Evangelical Divinity School back in January. I'll hear a decision on that one sometime in March. I'm feeling nervous about that one. Did I mention I also struggle with fear, too? How badly is my salvation in danger from that, I wonder? I have a hard time trusting God with the details of my life. No problem when it comes to the lives of others. But my own? Hmmmm. I'm still working my faith out with much fear and trembling. Again, I remember that my salvation is in God's hands, and that nothing can separate me from the love of God for me in Jesus Christ.

I need to get my post off to Durham before the end of the month. The I have to wait until early April (I think it's early, but it may be mid). And there, I have to wait as well. Wait. Wait. Wait. My worst insecurities whisper of my future defeats and disappointments. They want to convince me, before I've even received a rejection notice, that I'm not going to be accepted. Fortunately, God knew what he was doing when he brought me into marriage with Sarah. Her genuinely faithful and faith-filled optimism and trust-laden words encourage me, pretty much daily, to trust in God's sovereignty. And I wonder if I'm good enough. And she tells me God makes me good. and smart. and faithful and faith-filled.

In the meantime, I'm teaching at church on Wednesday nights. Organizing and teaching (most weeks) our Lenten devotions. This past week was our first gathering since Ash Wednesday. The weather was crappy most of the day, and so our turn out was a bit lower than expected (though it was nice to see the fifteen people that showed up!). But God is good, and the presence of His Holy Spirit was thick and powerful. When I preach and/or teach, I feel God's presence like no other way. When I'm up front proclaiming Christ, preaching or teaching, I feel God's pleasure (to paraphrase Eric Liddell). What I've taught are always things that I need to hear and/or remember for myself and my own faith walk. God is so good.

This week reminded me that Jesus' wilderness experience came after He was baptized. And that through that whole experience, even while He was cut-off from other people, He was not alone, for the Spirit was in and with Him. My baptism serves as both a reminder of who I am, and a means by which to overcome temptation and evil around me. I am not alone. I am not my own. Baptism helps me remember who I am, and whose I am. It serves as the conduit through which I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.

Through Christ, I can wait to hear from Trinity or from Durham. Through Christ, I can receive and accept notices of acceptance, or rejection. Through Christ, waiting may just be the hardest part.

How about you? What do you think?

what is your theology based upon?

There's no such thing as a pure or entirely biblically-correct theology. As humans, our thoughts and understandings about God, as inspired or 'Spirit-led' as they may be, are still filtered through the mesh of our own humanity and struggling sinfulness.

Are we destined to an impure or polluted interpretation of Scripture? Are we therefore unable to understand what God has revealed in the pages of the Bible? Who can help us? What can we do?

Panic is not an option. While there is no such thing as a pure reading of Scripture (or pure theology), there are things we may recognize and can do.

First, let us recognize that God is sovereign. Most of us reading this will agree that this is the case. And this being the case, we can trust that where God wants us to understand something in Scripture, He will make it known in His inestimable and mysterious ways. Having said that, however, we have a responsibility to be responsible in the way we interpret what is on the page. We can understand this dialectically. God has condescended for His interactions with humanity to allow for us to have some measure of freedom, knowing full well that that we may and sometimes will mess up (we see this happen in every area of life). This being said, we see our reading and subsequent interpretation of Scripture being in operational tension, where somehow, it's a mix between God's Sovereign revelation of self, and our own human intentions and effort.

Second, we must, in as much as it's possible to, both recognize and correct (or even repent of) the things that hinder our reading of Scripture. What I mean by this is simply that each of us is the product of our humanity, our culture, and our own wants and wills. 1) Our own sinfulness (or that of others) may effect our reading and interpretation of Scripture. 2) Our culture(s) that we inhabit will influence both. And 3) our own wants and wills, what we may call our agenda(s), definitely influence our reading and interpretation of Scripture.

There is no such thing as an objective theology. Some within the Liberal Protestant approach to theology may still claim as such, but if we are honest, we can simply acknowledge all of our readings of Scripture are in some way tainted with each of these in some measure. That being said, subjectivity always plays a part in our spiritual journey, for good and for bad. The question we must answer, therefore, is how can we both identify and understand, and where necessary, remove those "things" that influence the making and use of our theologies, both personal and corporate?

We must step back and try to identify them (feel free to make a list). Am I conservative, liberal, black, white, male, female, rich, poor, active, sedentary, urban, suburban, artistic, intellectual, etc.? I think you get my point.

Each of these things influences how we understand our world. Each influences how we interpret and understand who God is based on His self-revelation in the God-man Jesus Christ. Kevin Vanhoozer, Roger Olson, and several others have been propagating a new school of theological development and understanding that acknowledges the need to be "post" - that is post-conservative, post-propositional, and post-foundational. Note that the use of 'post' does not mean an utter rejection of any of the three, but rather that we must move beyond each while respecting what they have brought to the discussion so far.

In the end, our attempts to "purify" our theology is only going to be as effective as the power of the Spirit will allow for. And yet, we are called to pursue a good and proper reading of Scripture. God revealed Himself within a particular human context. We must trust that even within our own cultural, personal, and communal contexts, God can still reveal Himself and His divine will to us.

What do you think? Let me know.

Focus

I need prayer. I am in the midst of trying to come up with options and ideas for what I could possibly present as a valid proposal for a dissertation in some area of Theology. I need to discover the burning questions and issues inside of me. I need to focus these things into a subject that is acceptable for writing a 100,000 word dissertation for a Ph.D.

Would you help?

Please pray that the Holy Spirit would give me ideas, that these ideas would be fruitful, that they would be workable, detailed, and the sort of thing that I can willingly and joyfully invest at least three years of my life into.

Please pray that I might find favor in the sight of the King.

Thanks.

Is There Meaning In This Journey?

I have reached a bit of a crossroads. Though I'm still awaiting my final grades for my summary MTS papers, I've essentially graduated. I am now looking at Ph.D. programs, with most of my professors encouraging me to consider University programs over Seminary programs. I have also been encouraged to look at who is teaching at a particular institution, rather than just choose on name alone. To that extent, I've ruled my decision down to two American schools, Princeton and Trinity Evangelical Divinity Seminary.

But I find myself cornered by my own anxities. I wonder, do I really have something inside of me, trying to get out, something to be added to the ocean of knowledge already out there (and in some cases, drowning Christians?). I must resolutely answer, yes. I know it's in there. I know that it is.

O Lord, please help me. Help me to be patient; to wait upon You. Help me to trust in Your calling me. Help me to trust in what others see You doing in and through me. I am thankful for being a part of a gracious community of faith that seeks to speak faithfully, through Your very Spirit. I feel like You have shown me/revealed to me so much over these last few years. I believe that what I've learned, is, at least in part, pushing me toward this next part of my journey. But lest you, dear reader, think that this is where I root the meaning of my journey, you are wrong. The meaning of this journey comes from the One who first called me. And in the darknest night of my soul, that is not only what I must remember. More importantly, He is the One who reminds me of His call and calling, in the past, and through the present. O Lord, You are the very meaning in this journey. And for that, I am thankful.

And what about you, dear reader... is there meaning in your journey?