So last night gave me the opportunity to IM with a good friend that I've not seen in quite a while. But he's very good at IMing me whenever he sees me online, and always uses the opportunity to keep up with me.
So this brings up a good point: what does God call us to when we enter into a friendship? And is there a difference between friendships with fellow believers versus non-believers? What does it mean to keep up with your friends? As a Christian, what does it mean to be a friend?
Weigh in with your thoughts...
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Success & Failure in the Kingdom of God
About seven years ago I was on a youth minister's retreat that I have little recollection of other than one topic that was talked about: looking for effectiveness over success. Ever since then, I've been keen on redefining the matrix through which I thought about let alone evaluated how I was doing in ministry. I'm all for accountability, but I think that the Church has adopted worldly standards for deciding what's working and what isn't, and this has knocked us off course at times, and hurt a great many people.
As I read through the Gospels, I find Jesus who almost encourages us against worldly standards of success, "not for the sake of failing, but because there wasn't anything to win in the first place" (to quote Donald Miller). Instead, a great many churches, a great many pastors, and too many youth pastors are caught up the game of constant competition. What is for our culture one of its great strengths has become for the Church a great weakness. We want to win. We want to have the biggest congregations, the best attended Bible studies, the largest youth groups. But for what?
It seems to me that many of us are so enamored by worldly success, that we don't even see it in the Church. Instead, we have allowed it to taint our understanding of body life. We have traded true grace for a cheap imitation that shows its dross anytime someone (or some ministry) doesn't meet "corporate" performance expectations. We have chosen to accept "success" and fearfully look out for "failure" all at the expense of what is by far more important, faithfulness and calling.
To that end, I would submit that because of this, there are many "ministries" that have attracted lots of people, but are not necessarily accomplishing much for the kingdom. Now, I don't have an axe to grind in writing all of this. Instead, I think most Western (e.g., American) churches suffer from this. We need to understand that the economy of the Kingdom operates by different rules. We are to be patient, not afraid of time, investing ourselves in people, both individually and family (or community), trusting God to multiply our ministry and outreach in ways that will far outpace a corporate American solution to the challenges of ministry because we are merely seeking to be faithful and obedient to Him who called us in the first place. In keeping faithfulness and calling at the forefront of evaluating ministry, we allow for God to show us our "successes" and where we are "failing".
The way the world judges such things is always to say that they are looking for a clear winner. This is not God's ways - for in the Kingdom, all of God's people are winners. He's looking for faithful people, not successful.
What do you think?
As I read through the Gospels, I find Jesus who almost encourages us against worldly standards of success, "not for the sake of failing, but because there wasn't anything to win in the first place" (to quote Donald Miller). Instead, a great many churches, a great many pastors, and too many youth pastors are caught up the game of constant competition. What is for our culture one of its great strengths has become for the Church a great weakness. We want to win. We want to have the biggest congregations, the best attended Bible studies, the largest youth groups. But for what?
It seems to me that many of us are so enamored by worldly success, that we don't even see it in the Church. Instead, we have allowed it to taint our understanding of body life. We have traded true grace for a cheap imitation that shows its dross anytime someone (or some ministry) doesn't meet "corporate" performance expectations. We have chosen to accept "success" and fearfully look out for "failure" all at the expense of what is by far more important, faithfulness and calling.
To that end, I would submit that because of this, there are many "ministries" that have attracted lots of people, but are not necessarily accomplishing much for the kingdom. Now, I don't have an axe to grind in writing all of this. Instead, I think most Western (e.g., American) churches suffer from this. We need to understand that the economy of the Kingdom operates by different rules. We are to be patient, not afraid of time, investing ourselves in people, both individually and family (or community), trusting God to multiply our ministry and outreach in ways that will far outpace a corporate American solution to the challenges of ministry because we are merely seeking to be faithful and obedient to Him who called us in the first place. In keeping faithfulness and calling at the forefront of evaluating ministry, we allow for God to show us our "successes" and where we are "failing".
The way the world judges such things is always to say that they are looking for a clear winner. This is not God's ways - for in the Kingdom, all of God's people are winners. He's looking for faithful people, not successful.
What do you think?
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Ch-ch-changes
This Summer has brought about some pretty extensive and impacting changes in my life – almost as big as when I first became a dad for the first time (and the second and the third, for that matter). That David Bowie song seems to be my new theme. Today, August 1st, marked an end and a beginning, as I began my new life apart from working in and for the church. I am no longer David Feiser, youth pastor, director of NPC’s ministry to youth and their families. But I am still David Feiser, husband, dad, follower of Christ, friend, son, brother, cousin, uncle, and witty person (okay, that last one may be up for debate).
I’ve had some mixed feelings about this change. It was almost two months ago that I was encouraged to take this step and follow what many of us considered to be the Lord’s leading (though we weren’t in agreement on His timing). I’ve both looked forward to today, and also dreaded it. What I’ve discovered is that there’s no “right” way to feel about it. Many of my students weren’t happy with the news, and were savvy enough to know that there was more to the story than just what they were told. But they were good sports, very supportive, and I hope they will continue to grow in their faith and not abandon Christ because of self-righteous folk who chose to operate behind the scenes (what does 1 John have to say about people who like darkness? – what???).
So this day came, and here I am, reclining on my living room sofa, my headphones linked to my lap top, listening to the Narnia movie soundtrack, punching out this blog entry, contemplating what God has in store for me. Here’s what I understand (or at least think I do): I’ve got the entire month of August as something of a paid vacation; I’m going to be a full-time student, starting in September; God is leading me and my family on this new road that is part of our journey of faith.
While I’m sad about leaving youth ministry, I’m excited about this new opportunity. I’m excited about what is out there. I’m imagining that there are many more changes coming. I’m not sure I want to know about some of them. I’m hoping that most of them are good, positive, and healthy for all of my family. I’m hoping that my faith in Jesus Christ will meet each of them, good or bad, and be able to use them all to grow me closer to God and closer to the image of Jesus. I’m hoping that through this change – all the changes – that I will become more faithful and faith-filled, trusting God with more and more of my life and family. This being the first day of the rest of my life, I’m not sure what to make of it. The only thing that has changed is my employment. I’m still a Christian. I still have the same friends at church, in my neighborhood, from my social circles, and my family, both immediate and extended. I’m still about 25 lb.s over-weight, a bit out of shape, but ruggedly handsome.
Someone once said, “the more things change, the more they stay the same.” I don’t know how true that is, but overall, as I move into full-time student-hood, most of my life is still the same. My future is as open-ended as ever, I just feel it a bit more acutely than I did a couple of months ago. God is still watching over me, walking with me, and leading me. I am in awe, for in spite of such changes, God is with, unchanging, and I am at peace.
I’ve had some mixed feelings about this change. It was almost two months ago that I was encouraged to take this step and follow what many of us considered to be the Lord’s leading (though we weren’t in agreement on His timing). I’ve both looked forward to today, and also dreaded it. What I’ve discovered is that there’s no “right” way to feel about it. Many of my students weren’t happy with the news, and were savvy enough to know that there was more to the story than just what they were told. But they were good sports, very supportive, and I hope they will continue to grow in their faith and not abandon Christ because of self-righteous folk who chose to operate behind the scenes (what does 1 John have to say about people who like darkness? – what???).
So this day came, and here I am, reclining on my living room sofa, my headphones linked to my lap top, listening to the Narnia movie soundtrack, punching out this blog entry, contemplating what God has in store for me. Here’s what I understand (or at least think I do): I’ve got the entire month of August as something of a paid vacation; I’m going to be a full-time student, starting in September; God is leading me and my family on this new road that is part of our journey of faith.
While I’m sad about leaving youth ministry, I’m excited about this new opportunity. I’m excited about what is out there. I’m imagining that there are many more changes coming. I’m not sure I want to know about some of them. I’m hoping that most of them are good, positive, and healthy for all of my family. I’m hoping that my faith in Jesus Christ will meet each of them, good or bad, and be able to use them all to grow me closer to God and closer to the image of Jesus. I’m hoping that through this change – all the changes – that I will become more faithful and faith-filled, trusting God with more and more of my life and family. This being the first day of the rest of my life, I’m not sure what to make of it. The only thing that has changed is my employment. I’m still a Christian. I still have the same friends at church, in my neighborhood, from my social circles, and my family, both immediate and extended. I’m still about 25 lb.s over-weight, a bit out of shape, but ruggedly handsome.
Someone once said, “the more things change, the more they stay the same.” I don’t know how true that is, but overall, as I move into full-time student-hood, most of my life is still the same. My future is as open-ended as ever, I just feel it a bit more acutely than I did a couple of months ago. God is still watching over me, walking with me, and leading me. I am in awe, for in spite of such changes, God is with, unchanging, and I am at peace.
Friday, June 16, 2006
the surprises of God
I've had the most amazing week of my life, I think. It has been a roller coaster ride of sorts that has taken me from the pits of despair to a summit of peace. And I've probably dipped down and risen back up a few times, too.
This Sunday my congregation is celebrating the completion of my tenth year as youth director by calling me forward at both our Sunday worship gatherings (we label them "services"), and praising God for all that He's done through me. Then my pastor is going to announce that our Session (what we call our board of elders) has discerned and affirmed a call for me to transition out of the youth ministry and into full-time studies at seminary - I've been going part-time for the last four years - so that I may go onto pursue a PhD, and move into a full-time teaching ministry. To say I'm feeling bowled over is an understatement.
The process by which this decision was arrived at excluded me and my wife. The timing in which it was presented and set was not our own. I list these things first not because I have a chip on my shoulder, but because I want to speak honestly. While I believe in the elder's authority to come together and receive such leading from the Holy Spirit, I think there are other factors at work that could be described as well-intentioned people making some faulty assumptions and presumptions as to what is or isn't best for all parties. That, coupled with a rushed process, casts a least a slight palor over what in the end is a glorious changing of the guard.
Because while I'm disappointed with the process and timing, my wife and I are excited and celebrating this news. For one thing, it confirms what she and I have been talking about on and off for the last few years, and in depth over the last few months. We have the peace of God which transcends all understanding. To say I'm surprised is another understatement. Up until a week or so ago, I thought (was hoping) I would be involved at the youth ministry here for at least another year, maybe two or three. I felt like there were still a number of things for me to work on, do, and share with students, families, and fellow youth workers alike.
Yet God knows, doesn't He? Even though (in my opinion) there are some flaws to how this came about, God's perfect plan is being worked out through imperfect human beings, of whom I am one. I hope that anyone reading this will understand how thankful I am to God, and to the men and women who comprise the board of elders of our church. It took a lot of courage for them to strongly, and prayerfully, to consider something so incredible that it actually holds a lot of excitement for a great many of us.
If any of my students read this, please do not take anything that is written as any sort of rejection. Just the opposite. I've valued my last ten years of ministry at this church. My time spent with my students is among the most cherished of possessions. I love my students. To friends who might be reading this, please pray for us. There are a number of things that have to happen. And some of them need to happen soon. But we've seen God move quickly here, and I beleive He will not disappoint us by providing what we need to make this vision a reality.
I thank God for my last ten years in ministry to youth and their families. I praise God for this next opportunity to serve Him and His people. Praise God!!!
This Sunday my congregation is celebrating the completion of my tenth year as youth director by calling me forward at both our Sunday worship gatherings (we label them "services"), and praising God for all that He's done through me. Then my pastor is going to announce that our Session (what we call our board of elders) has discerned and affirmed a call for me to transition out of the youth ministry and into full-time studies at seminary - I've been going part-time for the last four years - so that I may go onto pursue a PhD, and move into a full-time teaching ministry. To say I'm feeling bowled over is an understatement.
The process by which this decision was arrived at excluded me and my wife. The timing in which it was presented and set was not our own. I list these things first not because I have a chip on my shoulder, but because I want to speak honestly. While I believe in the elder's authority to come together and receive such leading from the Holy Spirit, I think there are other factors at work that could be described as well-intentioned people making some faulty assumptions and presumptions as to what is or isn't best for all parties. That, coupled with a rushed process, casts a least a slight palor over what in the end is a glorious changing of the guard.
Because while I'm disappointed with the process and timing, my wife and I are excited and celebrating this news. For one thing, it confirms what she and I have been talking about on and off for the last few years, and in depth over the last few months. We have the peace of God which transcends all understanding. To say I'm surprised is another understatement. Up until a week or so ago, I thought (was hoping) I would be involved at the youth ministry here for at least another year, maybe two or three. I felt like there were still a number of things for me to work on, do, and share with students, families, and fellow youth workers alike.
Yet God knows, doesn't He? Even though (in my opinion) there are some flaws to how this came about, God's perfect plan is being worked out through imperfect human beings, of whom I am one. I hope that anyone reading this will understand how thankful I am to God, and to the men and women who comprise the board of elders of our church. It took a lot of courage for them to strongly, and prayerfully, to consider something so incredible that it actually holds a lot of excitement for a great many of us.
If any of my students read this, please do not take anything that is written as any sort of rejection. Just the opposite. I've valued my last ten years of ministry at this church. My time spent with my students is among the most cherished of possessions. I love my students. To friends who might be reading this, please pray for us. There are a number of things that have to happen. And some of them need to happen soon. But we've seen God move quickly here, and I beleive He will not disappoint us by providing what we need to make this vision a reality.
I thank God for my last ten years in ministry to youth and their families. I praise God for this next opportunity to serve Him and His people. Praise God!!!
Friday, April 07, 2006
a poem for my wife on our 12th anniversary
12 years
Nothing rhymes with 12 years,
Nothing I know of, at least
So I’m trying to think of 12 years,
What has been the best?
As I keep thinking of 12 years,
A number of things come to mind
12 years, 12 years, 12 years,
It’s not that hard to find
One thing over 12 years,
We’ve had a kid or two, or three
Another thing over 12 years,
I’ve done all my moving with thee
A third thing over 12 years,
I’ve learned to smile more
A fourth thing over 12 years,
I really do snore
The fifth thing over 12 years,
We’ve joined two churches
A sixth thing over 12 years,
We’ve lived in four perches
A seventh thing over 12 years,
We’re still learning how to dance
The eighth thing over 12 years,
We’re still learning how to dance
The ninth thing over 12 years,
I like the way you cook,
The tenth thing over 12 years,
We’ve visited places in books
An eleventh thing over 12 years,
I’m gladder I married you,
And twelfth thing over 12 years,
I love you (more than giant, hurtling asteroids that are bigger than all the snickers bars ever consumed, and oceans of milk to make them go down easier, and the band-aids needed if those giant, hurtling asteroids hit earth, and bigger than any blisters we’d get trying to run away from both asteroids hitting earth and all those snickers bars that would probably topple down because of the laws of physics, being gravity, I’m talking about, of course, so my point is that I love you lots and lots and lots and lots and lots…etc. but do not add nausea
Nothing rhymes with 12 years,
Nothing I know of, at least
So I’m trying to think of 12 years,
What has been the best?
As I keep thinking of 12 years,
A number of things come to mind
12 years, 12 years, 12 years,
It’s not that hard to find
One thing over 12 years,
We’ve had a kid or two, or three
Another thing over 12 years,
I’ve done all my moving with thee
A third thing over 12 years,
I’ve learned to smile more
A fourth thing over 12 years,
I really do snore
The fifth thing over 12 years,
We’ve joined two churches
A sixth thing over 12 years,
We’ve lived in four perches
A seventh thing over 12 years,
We’re still learning how to dance
The eighth thing over 12 years,
We’re still learning how to dance
The ninth thing over 12 years,
I like the way you cook,
The tenth thing over 12 years,
We’ve visited places in books
An eleventh thing over 12 years,
I’m gladder I married you,
And twelfth thing over 12 years,
I love you (more than giant, hurtling asteroids that are bigger than all the snickers bars ever consumed, and oceans of milk to make them go down easier, and the band-aids needed if those giant, hurtling asteroids hit earth, and bigger than any blisters we’d get trying to run away from both asteroids hitting earth and all those snickers bars that would probably topple down because of the laws of physics, being gravity, I’m talking about, of course, so my point is that I love you lots and lots and lots and lots and lots…etc. but do not add nausea
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